Beauty Amid Loss

Most often when we hear or think about beauty, we subconsciously associate it with happy times. We may think of weddings, prosperity, sunshine, or even youth. It might not have occured to us that amid the harrowing, when things go awry, there is yet beauty. She is there. Yet she remains. Although she may lay low, or appear subdued when we've experienced the traumatic, yet she does not wane.

There are times when we as Ethnic Beauties may feel forgotten. Or one may experience death, or a divorce. Yet Beauty remains, amid the loss. Sometimes we experience sorrow. Yes, in the tough times, these recovering, yet rough economic times. Yet beauty remains. Sometimes life doesn't hand us what we desire. Other times, miraculously, we receive it, and then it is seemingly ... just gone ... Yet there is beauty, amid the loss.

Perhaps you've started a company. It may be growing, and now others feel the need to take it over. Or perhaps, like someone close to me, you are experiencing the unimaginable. In a broken voice, she said she does not feel like she will ever laugh, or feel joy, again. Yet beauty remains, amid the loss.

Some days we will feel very unlike ourselves, like running out of our own skin. Other days we will feel out of sorts, puffy, or bloated. We will undoubtedly face situations where we have no idea what to do. There will be days when work, family, or friends will get to us. There will be days when we will feel beat down, to the ground, as if the weight of the world rests upon our shoulders. Those and more, are the times when we will feel far from beauty, miles away from beautiful.

It is then that we have to draw on what we carry deep within us. As I told you, in previous articles, beauty resides in all of us. I must reiterate that true beauty is not only something that we put, or paint, on. She is many things, strength, sometimes, to face another day, to put one foot before the other, repeatedly. She is character, that which enables us not to scream, or cuss others out. Beauty will allow us to simply be, even at our lowest moments, our times of loss.

She isn't always flurry and fanfare. Beauty isn't always jewel-toned tops, stilettos, and sparkly eyeshadow. Sometimes she appears in a ratty old pair of jeans, or in the voice of a friend on the phone. Beauty amid loss is often encouragement, or she'll shine, in the face of the child that causes us to chuckle. Yes, even after we've experienced devastation. These are the times that beauty is most poignant. She is there we when hurt, when we must drag ourselves from bed, or force ourselves to work. Although we're not always conscious of hearing her, yet she whispers, "You're beautiful." And you know what? We are, because we persevere. We keep going, keep doing all we must... Until one day ... we laugh, fully, heartfelt, and out loud. Then, feat of all feats we again begin to shine, and FEEL beautiful.

How do I know? Simply because I do. I have been there, in the trenches of loss. I have been bewildered, depressed, angry, and have experienced the truly harrowing. Among other things, I lost my child. Yet, I can smile...now. And if life lasts I will inevitably revisit a similar, but hopefully not the exact same place. Then I will know, in my stillness, and in my solitude, that amid loss, beauty remains.