A NEW YEAR, and A NEW YOU! That’s what a list of resolutions should be all about.

Stop!

I don’t want to be a downer, but this isn’t realistic. For many new year beginnings, I’ve fell into that trap. Do you know the trap I'm talking about? Whether a parent or teen, please don’t decide that because it's a new year, this is the time to change everything about yourself that you don't like. I’ve made that type of list, and I failed. This year, I am going to be realistic. I have resolved not to make resolutions that require drastic changes. Drastic changes scare all of us and are one of the reasons we may fail with our lists. One little back track or mistake and poof, the list is crumpled and forgotten.

This year, let’s make changes and goals that are realistic and gradual. And . . . let’s try and vow not to plan for, or expect others to change. Our lists should be about only ourselves. “Ourselves” is who we have control over.

How do we do this? We make refinements instead of resolutions. Refinements are small changes and improvements we can make. Small changes are easier to handle, are not overwhelming, and do not hold drastic disappointments that stop us from trying. This type of list will ensure that we won’t fail, we will finish!

I’ve made such a list and want to share with you how I did it.

Think about adding things to your list that would address both the inside and outside of yourself. I will give you some examples. Keep in mind, you don’t have to add every little thing on your list. You also can break your finished list into weeks or months, adding or deleting whatever you wish. Let’s make a list that will help you refine . . .

1. Your Overall Health - This can mean any exercise programs you wish to add or start, any weight you might want to lose or gain, or any unhealthy habits you want to curtail or stop.

2. Your Overall Daily Life Interactions - This can include working on things like your patience, anger, frustrations, time issues, work, school schedules or other such areas you wish to work on.

3. Your Overall Creativity - This can be anything from creating, reading, watching or listening more to the things you enjoy. You can also work on starting new hobbies and interests as well as working on forgotten ones.

4. Your Overall Education - This does not have to be about your current classes. This is an area for things you would LIKE to learn about. It can include learning about pop culture, current events, new software programs, cooking, gardening . . . anything that you have an interest in learning in the new year.

Once again, don’t overwhelm yourself. You can pick one of the above categories, and/or maybe just one thing in that category. It’s your list and your choice. Be realistic with your time and your level of desire when you are writing down the things you want to refine about your life and yourself.

I wish to you all a Happy New Year! I also look forward to talking with you in the BellaOnline Teen Site forum!