Age and Fertility

Other articles on this site have discussed fertility and age. It should come as no surprise that fertility declines with age since women are born with all the eggs they'll ever have. However, how do some women manage to have babies in their 40s, and some in their 50s?

It is still possible to have a baby, even naturally, in your early 40s. It is not as easy as when you're younger, though. If you have good genetics, you may still be quite fertile in your 40s. Some women are still fertile enough that in vitro fertilization (IVF) works for them, too. No matter how it happens, women have healthy babies in their 40s all the time.

Where it gets much more unlikely is late 40s and 50s. Frankly, most of those women used egg donors. The one exception is women who went through IVF in their 30s and had embryos to freeze. Those may be unfrozen and used in another cycle, and that may lead to a successful pregnancy. Women are often reluctant to talk about having used an egg donor for the same reason that men do not wish to admit that they had to use a sperm donor to have children--pride. While studies are limited, it is estimated that at least 50% of couples who used a sperm donor never tell the child the truth.

But the problem with this silence is that ordinary women see celebrities in their late 40s and 50s having babies and claiming that they are their "real" children. While it is none of anybody else's business, it leads to this perception that it's possible and may even encourage women to postpone having children to the point that it's too late.

Now there is a movement to freeze your eggs when you are in your 20s or early 30s as a precaution. Not a bad idea, but not a really proven one yet. Embryos freeze better than eggs do currently, and that is probably the best option. To do that, you would need sperm--either from a willing friend or an anonymous donor. Both options carry a lot of questions and potential ramifications down the road, so think long and hard about what you want to do.

I encourage you to explore your options when you're younger if you know for sure that you want children someday, and you would like for them to be related to you genetically. It may never be necessary, but it does give you peace of mind. On the other hand, if you could accept using an egg donor if "Mr. Right" doesn't show up on time, know that that is a perfectly legitimate option, too. In the end, you're still a mother.